Name deleted, p.1
Name Deleted, p.1Ray Daley
Copyright 16/09/2002 by Raymond Daley
INT. PRISON CELL
PRISONER is sitting on a rectangular bunk in a cell; the cell is an 8-foot cube. The walls are a light grey, there's a strip light recessed into the centre of the ceiling. It lights the whole room, it's quite bright so there isn't much shadow in the room. The door is in the foreground, on the left-hand side.
The bunk is in the background, set into the right wall, so PRISONER'S head is touching the right corner wall. Unless written as otherwise, all PRISONER'S lines are spoken as narrative. When the CENSOR speaks, it is as a voice off-camera, to drown out what PRISONER is saying. PRISONER is wearing a grey one-piece tunic, a few shades darker than the colour of the cell.
PRISONER (SPOKEN AS NARRATIVE)
I've been sitting in this cell for nine days now. What did I do? They must have detected some violation against the codes.
I couldn't even begin to guess what I might have done.
PRISONER has been sitting on the bunk while saying this.
They took me on Zone day and today is Zenith day because I heard the Zenith bell ringing from Latin Square, so I think it must be at least about nine days
by now. It's hard to be sure.
PRISONER moves his head and now looks toward the cell door, then slowly around the cell.
I must be in the Judgement Building. When I heard the Zenith bell it was very close by. Latin Square is only two blocks from the Judgement Building and the bell sounded very loud.
PRISONER gets up from the bunk in the corner, which he is sitting on. It's a cross between a bunk bed and a bench; there are no visible blankets or pillows. He walks toward the cell door, and his narrative continues as he paces between the door and the bunk.
When the officers spoke to me they asked me about a man called
CENSOR (DISEMBODIED VOICE)
And where I had first heard him mentioned. The big one with the ugly face had asked me that.
PRISONER walks back to the bunk and sits facing the door, with his back against the wall. His feet are in the air and he's looking at his shoes. They're shiny and he's miserable.
I told him that I knew no one of that name. I don't think he really cared if I was telling the truth. The skinny one asked when I had first met
And had I met him directly or did I have another contact, A
I told SKINNY that I had not heard of this man either. This was the first time I had heard those names. SKINNY just sneered at me and I was taken back to the cell.
PRISONER is nodding to himself as he says the next lines.
That was my first interview, but I knew they'd want to speak to me again. And real soon.
PRISONER lies on the bed and sleeps facing the wall, He is dreaming. We enter his dream. This is a flashback.
EXT. A STREET WITH TERRACED HOUSES, DAYTIME.
The houses are beautiful, it looks like small-town America. A lot like the street used in Edward Scissorhands, but only one of the gardens has grass. There are no cars to be seen.
As the steadi-cam camera pans down the street, we pass a big blue van with the words FedPol Patrol stencilled in white on the side. We stop in front of two houses; the house with the grass is on our left. There is a man mowing the grass. PRISONER is watching through the front window of the house on the right.
As I slept in the cell I remembered about the day they had taken my neighbour away, It was the day before they took me.
INT. INSIDE PRISONERS HOUSE, LOOKING THROUGH THE WINDOW TO THE GARDENS
We are behind PRISONER, looking over his shoulder at his POV. He is watching the mowing man, and shaking his head in a negative way. The window is slightly ajar; the mower engine can be heard.
I was thinking to myself how ridiculous the FedPols had got, that they were changing the codes every other day.
PRISONER sees the FedPol van stop in front of mowing mans garden. 2 men in very dark grey uniforms get out. They are wearing full body armour; their helmet visors are smoked glass so you don't see their faces.
So many trivial things had now become punishable by adjustment. He was out there, mowing his lawn. He'd paid more than fifty thou' for that two square metres of turf.
As PRISONER looks through the window at the mowing man, you can also see the reflection of his own face on the glass.
I'd always said it'd never grow, but he proved me wrong. But still, all that time he'd put in suddenly didn't matter to the FedPols.
The two officers approach the mowing man; He turns off the mower and looks at both of the Officers.
FEDPOL OFFICERS (SPEAKING TO MOWING MAN)
Sorry, but that's against the code Citizen! You'll have to come with us I'm afraid.
The FedPol Officers take Mowing Man and his mower to their van, he goes with them peacefully. PRISONER watches them take him and put both him and the mower inside the van and close the van doors.
That's what they said to him, as he was put into the Peace Wagon.
PRISONER pauses for a moment, a few seconds pass. He is watching the van front doors closing as the officers get back in.
He went quietly. Everyone does. Is there any other way?
INT. PRISON CELL
PRISONER awakes. Time has passed. He sits up on the bed facing the door, recalling another memory.
I was taken to be questioned again earlier today.
CROSS FADE TO
INT. INTERVIEW ROOM
CROSS FADE IN
We are in a darkened room with a small rectangular table large enough to seat PRISONER on one side and two guards opposite him.
We are shooting from behind the guards with occasionally glances from PRISONERS POV, looking briefly at the guards who are interviewing him.
There is a wall visible behind PRISONER; it's the same grey colour as the cell. When we see from PRISONER'S POV, the wall behind the guards looks almost identical.
The room is dark enough to use parts of the cell set. There is never a time when the whole room is seen, so this can be a partial set. This initial shot is over the shoulders of the guards, looking at PRISONER. When the guards speak, it is aloud.
PRISONER (STILL AS A NARRATIVE)
The two guards continued to question me relentlessly. They asked me who had told me about
And where had I heard of him, they wanted to know everything. I just couldn't remember, but I was desperately trying to help like a good Citizen should do.
The guards are now viewed from PRISONERS POV. The guard sitting on the left (UGLY) is balding and obese; he has a scar on his right cheek. The guard sitting on the right (SKINNY) is skinny and wiry looking. He is wearing steel rimmed glasses. They don't fit very well, so he keeps pushing them back up on his nose. They are both wearing similar grey uniforms.
UGLY had asked me
Where were you on Xavier's day?
I told him that I always spent that holiday having a meal in the same Cafe.
This really surprised me. UGLY then played a tape of my conversation with the waiter.
Running in the background is a recording being played from somewhere, UGLY will gesture with his right hand and the recording starts. We hear the recording, playing in the background as a muffled conversation running parallel to PRISONER'S narrative about it.
WAITER (MUFFLED LIKE A RECORDING)
Happy Xavier's day sir, may I take your order?
I heard myself order
PRISONER (ALSO MUFFLED LIKE A RECORDING)
I'll have a salad and a cold beer please.
And the waiter's response.
Certainly sir, I'll bring your drink directly and the food will take a short while. Enjoy your meal, and thank you for eating at Zelo's on Xavier's day!
I then heard myself start to speak and then I heard my own voice say
Was that your voice on the tape?
As PRISONER nods his head in affirmation, he speaks this line as narrative.
I could only nod in the affirmative, the detectors in the room would have known if I were lying anyway. SKINNY was enjoying the moment of glory and made sure the detectors knew as well.
Let the record show that the prisoner has nodded his head in the affirmative. This has been visually observed by both myself and my partner.
SKINNY turns to UGLY and grins, gleefully.
Yeah, He's telling the truth
UGLY sneers at PRISONER, he is gloating.
There you are, little man. Condemned by your own words.
UGLY draws the thumb of his right hand across his throat in the familiar throat slitting gesture. The two guards stand and escort PRISONER into the darkness.
CROSS FADE TO
INT. PRISON CELL
The door opens and PRISONER is propelled into the room and onto the floor by UGLY and SKINNY. PRISONER is in the middle of the room, kneeling on the floor. He turns and SKINNY is closing the cell door. SKINNY smiles like a shark and flips a fake salute at PRISONER as he closes the cell door.
Now don't you go no-where, we'll be back real soon. So play nice!
PRISONER clambers to his feet and walks over to the bunk. He stands at the foot of the bunk with his back to the door, he's clenching his fists.
I went through the conversation I'd had with the waiter at Zelo's, and suddenly, I remembered.
PRISONER sits on the bunk and puts his hands to his temple in a moment of realisation. He holds his head in his hands and shakes his head.
I HAD said that name! I called out to the ever present, but invisible detectors.
PRISONER removes his hands from his head and looks up to the ceiling. He places his hands together in front, as if praying.
PRISONER (SPEAKING ALOUD)
Wait! Now I remember! I DID say it. I did say
PRISONER raises his hands to the ceiling, in expectation.
PRISONER (SPEAKING ALOUD)
I'm guilty! Adjust me!
The room fills with a thick cloud of gas, eventually obscuring PRISONER from sight
EXT. PRISONERS HOUSE
PRISONER is standing outside his front door; we are seeing him from the POV behind a FedPol van. We also see two FedPol Officers, one is dictating into a handheld device.
FEDPOL OFFICER 1
Federal log record 5327-Alpha. The Prisoner has woken after his adjustment, returned to his domicile. Any other incidents in the vicinity, control?
CONTROLLERS VOICE (OVER THE RADIO)
That's an affirm Peace Wagon Lambda 20. Report to Sector 26, Block 12. Code Violation Three twenty seven, Ten offenders. Seize all offenders and bring them in. Use all necessary force as you see fit. The use of lethal force has been approved by the FedPolMarshal.
The officer punches in something on a console in the van.
FEDPOL OFFICER 1
Offenders, they never learn!
He and his partner shake their heads in disbelief.
FEDPOL OFFICER 2
Guess not. At least we're on overtime again though.
FEDPOL OFFICER 1
Roger control, on our way. Lambda 20 out.
The van drives away, we see PRISONER enter his house and the front door closes behind him.
FADE TO BLACK.
NARRATIVE OVER VDU SCREEN
As these lines are spoken, they appear as if typed onto the screen. They are a large font and easily visible. They are spoken by a female voice.
This concludes the statement of Prisoner Kappa 271398. Prisoner Kappa 271398 pleaded guilty to code violation twelve sixty three, formally speaking his own given birth name. He has been adjusted to level four in accordance with regulation nine of the official code. This record is to be erased under statute twelve of the official code, constituting a danger to FedPol security. Termination of entry by Operator 97643B.
The screen blinks for a few seconds as a cursor blinks on and off. The following entry then appears.
After deletion of these entries Operator 97643B will be adjusted to level two in accordance with FedPol statutes governing security policies. Termination of entry by Operator 97643B.
Another pause as the cursor flashes.
Addendum. Prisoner Kappa 271398 was later charged with code violation eighty nine twenty four, using descriptive names which are not politically correct, to whit names used to describe FedPol Officer Quebec 73 and FedPol Officer Delta 15. Prisoner Kappa 271398 will require further adjustment, possibly up to level ninety-four. A hearing has been set to decide if Prisoner Kappa 271398 is a persistent offender. Permanent adjustment may be required. Termination of entry by Operator 97643B.
The cursor flashes several more times.
ENTRIES DELETED, ADJUSTMENT TO OPERATOR PERFORMED. SECURITY STATUS NORMAL. TERMINATION OF ENTRY.
The screen flashes the words ENTRIES DELETED, five times. The screen then flashes the words STATUS NORMAL five times. The screen flashes the words TERMINATION OF ENTRY five times. The screen changes to show the FedPol Logo.
FADE TO BLACK.
After a rather unwarranted review about bad formatting I have done a fixed version of "Name Deleted" that is no longer in exact script layout.
This was written for a competion run by the SciFi channel back when they were still called that in that way. This came in the top 50 and won me a t-shirt, a glow in the dark alien keyring and an inflatable alien.
The winner had their script filmed and shown at cinemas.
Name Deleted by Ray Daley / History & Fiction have rating 3.4 out of 5 / Based on17 votes